Jabhinneg is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, sapient human.

Jabhinneg created the Sombrero Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jabhinneg, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Jabhinneg, she will turn you into a frog.

Jabhinneg's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Jabhinneg's Holy Commandments

1. Never adorn your face with fawn markings.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Shun those given to cruelty.

4. Do not prepare coconuts while wearing coats.

5. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.