Hogpigcab is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, dishonourable tortoise.

Hogpigcab created vertebrates four years ago.

If you believe in Hogpigcab, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hogpigcab, she will send minions to preach to you.

Hogpigcab's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Hogpigcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of order in the presence of strangers.

2. Feed all hungry capybaras.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never approach forests carrying clay.

5. Remain kneeling during prayer.