Kamlopsit is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, able beaver.

Kamlopsit created viruses nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Kamlopsit, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Kamlopsit, it will try to impress you with trees.

Kamlopsit's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Kamlopsit's Holy Commandments

1. Never approach forests carrying wood.

2. Retreat if three otters approach from the south.

3. Never whisper while facing east.

4. Do not gather at wells at midday.

5. Never think about chlorophyll.