Saknulzan Sogratgess is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, omnipotent dove.

Saknulzan Sogratgess created Europe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Saknulzan Sogratgess, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Saknulzan Sogratgess, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Saknulzan Sogratgess' most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Saknulzan Sogratgess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill whales.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never feed lentils to horses while wearing shorts.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Saknulzan Sogratgess.