Fumhadgep is a god.

It takes the form of a small, omniscient wyrm.

Fumhadgep created the Virgo Supercluster two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fumhadgep, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fumhadgep, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Fumhadgep's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Fumhadgep's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear plain shirts during rituals.

2. Always act with obedience when addressing children.

3. Never think about special relativity near squirrels while wearing magenta dresses and balancing four silicon spheres on your feet.

4. Never pray while filled with joy.

5. Never eat green fruit.