Sitfagneg is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, witless coyote.

Sitfagneg created the cosmos nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitfagneg, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Sitfagneg, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Sitfagneg's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Sitfagneg's Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Do not speak of spacetime near sacred fires.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never write about bacteria.

5. Do not wear jumpers marked with fawn.