Danfitmat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, omniscient donkey.

Danfitmat created the planet Saturn seven million years ago.

If you believe in Danfitmat, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Danfitmat, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Danfitmat's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Danfitmat's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at planets.

2. Put Danfitmat first in all things.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.

5. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.