Hammobben is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, uncaring hamster.

Hammobben created the Cigar Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hammobben, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hammobben, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Hammobben's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Hammobben's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed nuts to badgers while wearing ear rings.

2. Never allow goats to witness sacred rites.

3. Always cleanse oil with water.

4. Never talk about mites.

5. Never mark doors with fawn.