Cepsaksaf is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, impressive grasshopper.

Cepsaksaf created a top quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cepsaksaf, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cepsaksaf, she will turn you into a slug.

Cepsaksaf's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Cepsaksaf's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry capybaras.

2. Always wash your feet before prayer.

3. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching gold.

5. Never talk about grasshopers.