Hatshavbafomin is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, flying scorpion.

Hatshavbafomin created carbon six billion years ago.

If you believe in Hatshavbafomin, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hatshavbafomin, she will turn you into a hamster.

Hatshavbafomin's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Hatshavbafomin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never gather four whales in one place.

3. Never touch oil while blessed.

4. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Never adorn your feet with turquoise markings.