Bentitnut is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, bad-tempered raccoon.

Bentitnut created the planet Saturn five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bentitnut, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Bentitnut, he will turn you into a slug.

Bentitnut's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Bentitnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never mix turnips with blood.

2. Do not gather at wells at dawn.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never sprint near seals.