Ratdammut Teencimrot is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, self-confident yak.

Ratdammut Teencimrot created the cosmos five million years ago.

If you believe in Ratdammut Teencimrot, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ratdammut Teencimrot, it will cry a lot.

Ratdammut Teencimrot's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Ratdammut Teencimrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your face black.

2. Never hurt porpoises.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

5. Never allow eagles to sleep beneath your roof.