Jopmabjarn is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, temperamental rat.

Jopmabjarn created everything that exists eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jopmabjarn, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jopmabjarn, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Jopmabjarn's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Jopmabjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never speak at dawn.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always wash your chest before prayer.