Binhonzog is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, wise cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Binhonzog created water nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Binhonzog, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Binhonzog, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Binhonzog's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Binhonzog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

4. Always count to three before sleeping.

5. Never fashion tools from stone.