Padraptip is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, deceitful mole.

Padraptip created matter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Padraptip, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Padraptip, it will turn you into a dog.

Padraptip's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Padraptip's Holy Commandments

1. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

2. Do not speak of thermodynamics near sacred fires.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not contemplate ultrasonics during the night.

5. Never wear shorts.