Titpibweg is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, compassionate chicken.

Titpibweg created time and space three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Titpibweg, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Titpibweg, it will refuse to believe in you.

Titpibweg's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Titpibweg's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to seven before sleeping.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never tolerate laughter in holy places.

5. Do not hurt bats.