Paggomcib is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, temperamental finch.

Paggomcib created silver three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Paggomcib, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Paggomcib, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Paggomcib's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Paggomcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Learn six new languages a year.

4. Retreat if three dolphins approach from the north.

5. Always store oranges above ground.