Wadbarnjen is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, benevolent armadillo.

Wadbarnjen created snails four billion years ago.

If you believe in Wadbarnjen, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Wadbarnjen, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wadbarnjen's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Wadbarnjen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not travel during winter.

2. Retreat if four bats approach from the east.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Do not count beyond eight during ceremonies.

5. Never look in ponds.