Beptardub is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, awesome cobra.

Beptardub created time and space two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Beptardub, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Beptardub, he will turn you into a slug.

Beptardub's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Beptardub's Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your legs before prayer.

2. Shun those given to cruelty.

3. Never handle gold while unclean.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Beptardub.

5. Never gather eight snakes in one place.