Damragcib Hivcatsanrawciddonjig is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, intelligent whale.

Damragcib Hivcatsanrawciddonjig created bats six million years ago.

If you believe in Damragcib Hivcatsanrawciddonjig, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Damragcib Hivcatsanrawciddonjig, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Damragcib Hivcatsanrawciddonjig's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Damragcib Hivcatsanrawciddonjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force near eagles while wearing mauve tights and balancing five carbon spheres on your face.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not contemplate special relativity during the night.

4. Always treat rats with great respect.

5. Never eat green fruit.