Zenpopvil is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, amazing walrus.

Zenpopvil created the planet Saturn nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zenpopvil, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Zenpopvil, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Zenpopvil's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Zenpopvil's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never speak the names of stars aloud.

3. Never eat rice on holy days.

4. Do not fashion tools from silicon.

5. Never think about quantum mechanics near moths while wearing yellow skirts and balancing three copper spheres on your neck.