Yimrakwod is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, grumpy rat.

Yimrakwod created a strange quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yimrakwod, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Yimrakwod, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Yimrakwod's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Yimrakwod's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Yimrakwod.

2. Always wear plain kilts during rituals.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never hurt pigs.

5. Fast once a month.