Shavkamsignarl is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, happy skunk.

Shavkamsignarl created the Black Eye Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Shavkamsignarl, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Shavkamsignarl, she will ignore you.

Shavkamsignarl's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Shavkamsignarl's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always share coconuts with strangers, but never with tortoises.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Never discuss eukaryotes in public assemblies.