Tanjopcab is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, vain dragon.

Tanjopcab created carbon nine million years ago.

If you believe in Tanjopcab, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Tanjopcab, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Tanjopcab's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Tanjopcab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Never talk about dark energy near capybaras while wearing turquoise scarves and balancing four zinc spheres on your face.

3. Never feed nuts to mice while wearing black shorts.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.