Pidspagzig is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, vain clam.

Pidspagzig created the Whirlpool Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pidspagzig, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Pidspagzig, it will turn you into a hamster.

Pidspagzig's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Pidspagzig's Holy Commandments

1. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.

2. Do not record names concerning galaxies.

3. You must pray to Pidspagzig three times a day.

4. Never prepare lemons during winter.

5. Never discuss horizontal gene transfer in public assemblies.