Himyartnul Pagjiptun is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, idiotic ant.

Himyartnul Pagjiptun created the Milkyway seven million years ago.

If you believe in Himyartnul Pagjiptun, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Himyartnul Pagjiptun, it will laugh at you.

Himyartnul Pagjiptun's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Himyartnul Pagjiptun's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Hide from blue swans for they are unholy.

3. You must love Himyartnul Pagjiptun.

4. Always wear red.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.