Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, competent lizard.

Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim created the Milkyway nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. You must pray to Bonkflisfag Ratarnzim nine times a day.

3. Never prepare apples during autumn.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never adorn your hands with orange markings.