Kadfemfud is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, bad-tempered dingo.

Kadfemfud created life five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kadfemfud, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kadfemfud, he will destroy your favourite star.

Kadfemfud's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Kadfemfud's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch water while unclean.

2. Never write about asteroids.

3. Never speak the names of planets aloud.

4. Never speak of order in the presence of strangers.

5. Do not place bananas upon stone.