Cepfosszig is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, egotistical clam.

Cepfosszig created the Cigar Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Cepfosszig, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cepfosszig, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cepfosszig's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Cepfosszig's Holy Commandments

1. Cepfosszig loves whales, so they must be respected.

2. Never think ill of sick bats.

3. Never mark doors with red.

4. Never write about optics.

5. Always wear violet.