Appjadmum is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, passionate lizard.

Appjadmum created dark matter four billion years ago.

If you believe in Appjadmum, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Appjadmum, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Appjadmum's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Appjadmum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never remain bowed at dusk.

4. Always act with obedience when addressing priests.

5. Never point your hands toward the south during prayer.