Nancemsak is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, conceited dragon.

Nancemsak created an atom eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nancemsak, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nancemsak, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Nancemsak's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Nancemsak's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Nancemsak's priests.

2. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Nancemsak in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never allow snails to witness sacred rites.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Do not wear platinum on your body.