Likbenveenquat is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, bad-tempered crane.

Likbenveenquat created a quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Likbenveenquat, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Likbenveenquat, it will have a low opinion of you.

Likbenveenquat's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Likbenveenquat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear nickel on your body.

2. Do not gather at walls at dawn.

3. Always wear blue.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never eat melons on fasting days.