Botcimvig Botkanduss is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, unthoughtful shark.

Botcimvig Botkanduss created an up quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Botcimvig Botkanduss, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Botcimvig Botkanduss, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Botcimvig Botkanduss' most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Botcimvig Botkanduss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Botcimvig Botkanduss loves mites, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Do not hurt mice.