Yakdinxuck Geptonced is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, unjust salamander.

Yakdinxuck Geptonced created silver seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakdinxuck Geptonced, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Yakdinxuck Geptonced, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Yakdinxuck Geptonced's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Yakdinxuck Geptonced's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six iron sculptures of Yakdinxuck Geptonced on top of important buildings.

2. Never talk about dark matter near snakes while wearing indigo scarves and balancing three zinc spheres on your feet.

3. Do not wear copper on your body.

4. Yakdinxuck Geptonced loves otters, so they must be honoured.

5. Hide if seven voles approach from the south.