Kapappfun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, sage troll.

Kapappfun created Africa eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kapappfun, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kapappfun, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Kapappfun's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Kapappfun's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never bounce in holy places.

3. Do not count beyond nine during ceremonies.

4. Always store rice above ground.

5. Do not travel during autumn.