Fligzenwad is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, humorless goblin.

Fligzenwad created the universe two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fligzenwad, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fligzenwad, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Fligzenwad's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Fligzenwad's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry tapirs.

2. Birds are not to be trusted.

3. Never pray while filled with envy.

4. Always maintain patience during holy days.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near geese while wearing green rings.