Cungigsis Nartloprap is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, contented swallow.

Cungigsis Nartloprap created dark matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cungigsis Nartloprap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Cungigsis Nartloprap, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Cungigsis Nartloprap's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Cungigsis Nartloprap's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to five before sleeping.

2. Never eat coconuts.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. You must love Cungigsis Nartloprap.

5. Heed all portents.