Sidstikcub is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, all-knowing tortoise.

Sidstikcub created a down quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidstikcub, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Sidstikcub, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Sidstikcub's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Sidstikcub's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near mice while wearing red dresses.

3. Never feed lots of parsnips to ducks while wearing magenta kilts.

4. Do not wear brown clothing.

5. Do not speak of optics near sacred fires.