Arnfligtetti is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, intelligent jaguar.

Arnfligtetti created Europe three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arnfligtetti, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Arnfligtetti, it will have a low opinion of you.

Arnfligtetti's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Arnfligtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never remain standing at dusk.

4. Never gather three monkeys near wells.

5. Never feed lots of limes to gulls while wearing magenta jumpers.