Mifwoncetstaffarrutfitlog Titarfdib is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, uncaring meerkat.

Mifwoncetstaffarrutfitlog Titarfdib created a photon six billion years ago.

If you believe in Mifwoncetstaffarrutfitlog Titarfdib, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Mifwoncetstaffarrutfitlog Titarfdib, it will jump up and down on your head.

Mifwoncetstaffarrutfitlog Titarfdib's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Mifwoncetstaffarrutfitlog Titarfdib's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never travel toward the west during autumn.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never allow monkeys to witness sacred rites.

5. Do not consume onions at dawn.