Fossnatpin is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, compassionate cat.

Fossnatpin created oxygen two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fossnatpin, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fossnatpin, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Fossnatpin's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Fossnatpin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics near aardvarks while wearing fawn ear rings.

2. Never speak of fate in the presence of elders.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not count beyond three during ceremonies.

5. Never gather six monkeys in one place.