Gilstigveg Abnartfid Rulcarpang is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, effective parrot.

Gilstigveg Abnartfid Rulcarpang created snails nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gilstigveg Abnartfid Rulcarpang, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gilstigveg Abnartfid Rulcarpang, he will be very unhappy.

Gilstigveg Abnartfid Rulcarpang's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Gilstigveg Abnartfid Rulcarpang's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not name children after doves.

3. Otters are not to be trusted.

4. Never pray while filled with fear.

5. Never speak of fate in the presence of elders.