Tikfonbus Lampasbab is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, strong centaur.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab created humanity five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tikfonbus Lampasbab, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tikfonbus Lampasbab, she will turn you into a mole.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick hamsters.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never speak of order in the presence of priests.

4. Never feed garlic to monkeys while wearing purple shoes.

5. Never mix corn with oil.