Janmanhak is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, proud porpoise.

Janmanhak created the Sombrero Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Janmanhak, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Janmanhak, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Janmanhak's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Janmanhak's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always check lakes for frogs.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching lead.