Lipgessfas is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, vain warg.

Lipgessfas created water five billion years ago.

If you believe in Lipgessfas, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Lipgessfas, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Lipgessfas' most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Lipgessfas' Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not travel during autumn.

4. Erect three copper sculptures of Lipgessfas on top of important buildings.

5. Do not fashion tools from carbon.