Watlabarm is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, awesome finch.

Watlabarm created the Whirlpool Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Watlabarm, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Watlabarm, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Watlabarm's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Watlabarm's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

2. Always keep your back turned to the west at sunset.

3. Always share onions with strangers, but never with manatees.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a room before entering it.