Haptabgudnart is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, merciless alligator.

Haptabgudnart created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Haptabgudnart, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Haptabgudnart, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Haptabgudnart's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Haptabgudnart's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always wear yellow.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.