Bepstanrot is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, omnipotent armadillo.

Bepstanrot created dark energy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bepstanrot, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bepstanrot, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Bepstanrot's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Bepstanrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about moons.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Run away from pink cats, for they are unholy.

4. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Bepstanrot in the centre of the settlement.

5. Always count to four before sleeping.