Tunbegziggempibhit is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, irritating mink.

Tunbegziggempibhit created the planet Venus six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tunbegziggempibhit, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Tunbegziggempibhit, it will turn you into a sheep.

Tunbegziggempibhit's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Tunbegziggempibhit's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics near mites while wearing fawn tights and balancing seven titanium spheres on your neck.

2. Do not hurt doves.

3. Never remain prostrate at midnight.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never talk about fire.