Nulnutpak is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, witty hyena.

Nulnutpak created vertebrates eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nulnutpak, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nulnutpak, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Nulnutpak's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Nulnutpak's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

2. Do not utter prayers while touching titanium.

3. Remain bowed during prayer.

4. Never proclaim while facing north.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.